Afraid You Will Have To Sacrifice Your “Social Life” When Baby Arrives?
When you have a baby your whole life changes.
I remember the anxiety during my first pregnancy…………
The first pregnancy is always harder because there are so many unknowns and you basically rely on the stories and experiences of friends and family to dictate your own feelings and thoughts.
The one thing about me is I AM POSITIVE.
I try to always see the good first and I try to think that the best case scenario is what is going to happen to me.
But the reality is that most people are not like that and since they are negative by nature, they tend to have not so good of experiences to talk to you about. So they basically want to rain on your parade since theirs wasn’t so good.
I remember going out to dinner with friends during my first pregnancy and all people wanted to do is give us advice and tell us about all the things we would not be able to do once we had the baby.
The told us things like:
- “You will not be able to go out for months”.
- “You will never go out to dinner after 5pm”.
- “Its crazy taking a baby out to dinner, you won’t be able to have a good time”.
- “You will barely go out anymore”.
- “You will revolve your life around your baby”.
- “Say goodbye to your social life”.
These are all verbatim of what people told us.
But guess what?
It was totally not like that.
Because we didn’t let it.
The Choices We Made To Have Adjustable Happy Kids & A Great Social Life
- We decided to only listen to people who had positive things to say. Well, not listen, because we listened to everyone, but we only took into consideration things that were positive.
- We made a choice during our pregnancy that we wouldn’t let our baby dictate our lives.
- We made a choice that we would accommodate our kids into our lives.
- We made a choice that our kids would be “very adjustable”. (they could go anywhere, at anytime, even if “out of schedule”, and they would be able to behave, be happy, and adjust).
- We made a choice that we would still go out with friends and by ourselves and continue having a social life.
- We made a choice to take our kids with us wherever we wanted, whenever we wanted.
- We made a choice to teach our kids to go out to dinner with us (not a late lunch, dinner) LOL and be able to behave and make it through.
And guess what came out of all these choices?
From birth, we were always able to take both of our kids out at any time and they would be happy.
We never did 5pm dinners, though I do understand that for some people that is normal, but for a Cuban and a Venezuelan, that is far from normal. LOL
My daughter was 4 weeks old and we took her out to 7pm dinners.
Does that sound crazy to you?
Well, I’m not saying I made the girl suffer and stay up and not feed her and not put her to sleep. I just came prepared.
We would go to get togethers and parties with my son being months old and stayed out late and he was always good…….
But we went prepared.
Being Prepared Makes All The Difference
For dinners, we would take the baby’s pajamas, food, and nursing shall and later on bottle.
We kept to the baby’s schedule, we just didn’t “HAVE TO” be home for it.
So we would go out for dinner at say 7pm. If the baby was up at that time we would let her stay up. When it was feeding time and night night time, I would go in the bathroom, change her diaper, put her pj’s on and nurse her at the table while enjoying the company of my husband and son. I would then put her in her stroller with her blanket, pacifier and white noise machine, cover her up and to sleep she went while we enjoyed our dinner.
At the time to go home, we would put her in the car and drive home, sometimes she would wake up a little but she got used to being transported back to her crib to go back to sleep.
We did this weekly so she got in the habit of being transported from stroller to carseat, to crib.
My kids were never the type of kids to “not be able to be moved from place to place” without going back to sleep because we made them. We put them in scenarios to be able to do so and we did it consistenetly so they got used to it.
Those people that walk on egg shells and don’t move their kids once they fall asleep and tip toe around them, end up having kids that aren’t adaptable. They won’t just fall asleep or stay asleep anywhere, you can’t just move them from a stroller to a crib without them waking up……….
This is terrible.
Then its hard to go out, its crazy hard to travel.
That’s another one.
My kids can go anywhere and sleep anywhere because I made them.
I put them in scenarios where they would.
I would of course make them as comfortable as possible and be prepared with everything that I needed to make them comfortable (which takes time and effort but totally worth it). But we literally from birth to date have been able to go anywhere and our kids sleep perfectly, behave great and aren’t a mess just because “we aren’t home”.
When we travel, we take the pack and play, their blankets, pacifiers, food, bottle warmers, white noise makers, everything we need to make them feel comfortable. We may over pack but in the end its worth it because we can literally go anywhere and they will be fine.
We just went away for a weekend to a resort on the beach and right at the pool with the noise and the heat, we put my at the time 15 month old daughter in a little tent we have to take her 3 hour nap.
People were in shock that she could sleep that long and there.
But we had accustomed her to do so. And we did the same with my son.
We didn’t have to go up to our room for 3 hours for the baby to take her nap.
We were able to enjoy our son and stay with our friends while the baby took her nap.
We adjusted HER schedule to OURS.
And by doing things like this, we have had the experience of having 2 amazing kids that wake up between 8-10am no matter where we are. They go to bed between 8-9pm no matter where we are, but if they have to go to sleep later, they are fine, because we have exposed them to it (no crazy meltdowns), they have always taken 3-4hour naps whether in their cribs, stroller, on the boat, on the beach, anywhere and they are happy, adaptable kids.
We still have a social life, we never had to sacrifice it because of them.
We of course have changed a lot about our social life as we love to spend time with our kids so a lot of what we do we do with families that like to hang out with their kids too. But we continued going to parties, dinners, shopping, boating, vacationing, etc.
I remember going to parties and brining our kids (of course when there were other kids too). We would take pack and play, bottles, blankets, white noise maker…. We came prepared.
When it was bed time, I would go in a room, change them, feed them, and put them to sleep. And they would sleep through an entire party. But they were comfortable in their pack and play with their blanket and their music. But most importantly it didn’t matter the place they were at. As long as I took the things they needed to feel comfortable, we could go anywhere.
So, now you know……..
You don’t have to sacrifice your social life when you have a baby.
Actually, if you do, you may end up suffering.
If you don’t expose your kids to different scenarios and different schedules and different places, and help them be able to adjust, you will actually be a slave to them. And they won’t be happy. And you won’t be happy.
And you will find yourself having to leave places all the time before your supposed to because your kid is having a meltdown.
You will find yourself not being able to go to certain places at certain times because your kid will have a meltdown.
You will not rest on your vacation because your kid doesn’t know how to sleep anywhere other than in their perfect crib in their perfect home under the perfect circumstances……….
And that is just not reality.
Well, at least not my reality.
We like to be active and social and we like to hang out with our kids too. So doing what I just told you, we are able to do both.
I hope this helps you and encourages you that your life doesn’t have to end lol just because you have kids 😉
Listen, I loved being pregnant and I had 2 amazing pregnancies and I love to empower women to enjoy their pregnancies and not have so many fears and anxieties.
That is why I blog so much about it.
I love helping pregnant women be fit and healthy and enjoy their pregnancies.
I would love for you to connect with me more.
I have a Pinterest Page where I have hundreds of posts on Pregnancy Exercise, Pregnancy Diet, Baby Info, Pregnancy Fashion, Recipes, everything you can think of that could help you during your pregnancy. So go there now and hit FOLLOW ALL so you can have easy access to it all during your pregnancy and not miss any of them.
I also have a new FACEBOOK PAGE just for pregnant women.
I post daily workouts, recipes and inspiration. So make sure to go there also and hit LIKE so that we can stay connected during your pregnancy. You can ask me questions there or talk about your concerns.
I am here for you during your pregnancy.
By the way, before you go, I want to give you one thing that will be literally LIFE CHANGING during your pregnancy.
It’s a Nutrition Guide.
And I want to give it to you because it really aggregates me that doctors don’t educate pregnant women enough about the importance of nutrition because it is so crucial.
Not only does it affect you, but it affects the baby as well.
So here is what I’m going to do for you. I’m going to give you a NUTRITION GUIDE with exactly what to eat, all the RECIPES, good SNACK OPTIONS, etc.. So that you can get an idea of how you should be eating during your pregnancy so that you can be healthy, be creating the best possible environment for your baby, and so that you don’t gain EXCESS WEIGHT so that you are not super uncomfortable all during pregnancy and feeling huge and self conscious. And so that you can lose all your baby weight fast postpartum.
I made this 2-Week Nutrition Guide to give away for FREE to all my pregos because I work with so many in my Fit Mom-To-Be Workout Program that always have so many NUTRITION questions. So, I figured I would make this in an easy to read, print and follow way to help you take the guesses out of how to eat optimally during your pregnancy.
If you follow it and you EXERCISE, you will not just have a great pregnancy but you will feel CONFIDENT, RADIENT, GLOWING. You won’t be uncomfortable and have aches and pains because you’ve gained so much weight. You will have an easier labor and delivery. You will sleep better, have more energy. And you will seriously decrease your chances of falling into POSTPARTUM DEPRESSION.
I can’t wait for you to get this Nutrition Guide, the recipes are amazing, and there are so many different options for snacks. You are going to love it. Download it here (It’s totally FREE): PREGNANCY NUTRITION GUIDE.
I hope you are inspired to follow it.
It will help you prevent excess weight gain, you will have less aches and pains because of it, you will have more energy, you will have less chances of getting morning sickness, you will have a faster labor and you will lose your baby weight so much faster.
Well if you follow it and you EXERCISE.
I really hope you are exercising.
There are so many benefits to exercise during pregnancy.
Check this out……
I, myself, followed this Nutrition Guide and I actually also followed my Fit Mom-To-Be Workouts and for both my pregnancies and I only gained 20 lbs in each pregnancy, felt great and was able to lose all my baby weight in less than a month.
I want that for you too, and I know you can, because so many of the ladies that do my Fit Mom-To-Be Workouts do too.
Check this out…….
You can totally do this too.
Good luck, and I look forward to being your Pregnancy Coach.